What comes of Electraberg lettuce
by Altaica
Summary: Iiiii'm baaa-aack! This time with a Rapunzel/CATS crossover....once again, completely tasteless but oh-so-very funny....hehehehe it was hard to do the crossover due to lack of characters so if you r/r be nice!!!!


What comes of Electraberg lettuce...  
Authors note: No, I don't know when to qui! Okay, so here's a CATS/Rapunzel crossover. Mwaha, enjoy!  
  
  
Once upon a time, a long time ago in some alternate reality where fairy tales and CATS were somehow crossed, there lived a tom named Tugger and a Queen named Bombalurina who, although they were simple farmers, didn't want any children. However, this is Tugger and Bomba we're talking about here, so of course the inevitable soon happened and Bomba was pregnant.  
  
Unknown to them, a witch named Etcetera lived next door. She grew wonderful foods, fruits and vegetables of all kinds, but especially a small, round-leafed lettuce. This lettuce was previously known as rapunzel but will not be called Electra....berg....electraberg in the hopes of giving this story some small plot.  
  
Anyhoo, Bomba was nearing the end of her pregnancy and she had her eye on the iceberg lettuce being grown next door. She begged and begged Tugger to snitch some for her, but the Tugger was a macho beast and refused to be seen carrying groceries. However, Bomba begged and begged and whined and whined and threatened to do the Macavity dance until he finally relented. After all, watching a pregnant queen do the Macavity dance is not a pretty sight.  
  
So, the Tugger went out and bought loads of catnip, getting sufficiently stoned before climbing over the low wall that separated the two houses and grabbed the iceberg lettuce. The Witch Etcetera was watching from the doorway, but she made no move to stop the Tugger. It went on like this until the day before Bomba was to have her kitten. That afternoon, the Witch switched the iceberg and the electraberg lettuces so that the Tugger would grab the wrong one.  
  
Tugger came, grabbed the wrong lettuce and went, and Etcetera crouched at the wall to listen. Bomba threw a fit, and Tugger hastily raced back to the wall to get the right kind of lettuce before he had electraberg lettuce imbedded in his perfect hairdo for all eternity.  
  
As Tugger loaded up his arms with the right lettuce, the Witch Etcetera stood and purred in what she obviously thought was a seductive voice, "Stop right there, you oh-so-very handsome thief."  
  
Tugger froze, his arms full of iceberg lettuce. "W-what do you want?" he asked woozily. The ground was starting to tilt, and the voice seemed to be coming from all sides. Catnip! He thought angrily to himself, that being his last truly coherent thought.  
  
Now, Etcetera thought that Tugger actually wanted this little bundle of joy that would be squalling next door starting tomorrow, so she went around to look Tugger in the face and said, "Leave Bombalurina for me or I will take the child from you at its birth tomorrow!"  
  
As we mentioned before, the Tugger was an extremely macho beast who had never wanted a kid in the first place. So he shrugged as best he could, being stoned and bogged down with lettuce. "Take the kid, it's all yours," he said before climbing back over the wall.  
  
Etcetera went inside her cottage and sulked. But then she devised what she thought would be a brilliant plan and would surely send Tugger to her arms. She would lock his (surely) beloved kitten up in a high tower and make her grow her headfur unfashionably and uncomfortably long. Surely, when Tugger heard of his kit's torture, he would agree to come to her.  
  
The child was born in the morning, and it was a girl child that looked nothing like either Bombalurina or the Tugger, which was fine by them, because they left if on Etcetera's doorstep with a note that said, "Have fun!" She heard them having their own fun as she left, but that's beside the point.  
  
She took the wee kit to a tower in the woods and, using her magical powers, aged her swiftly into a he equivalent of an eighteen-year-old-human with unnaturally long orange, black, and white headfur that reached clear to the ground at the base of the tower. Then she decided that if the kid was already eighteen she pretty much deserved a name, so she named her Electra in honor of the lettuce that fooled the Tugger.  
  
Now, there was a prince that was roaming the land, a nondescript prince that went by the name of Pouncival. He wandered the lands without a guard, and this proved amusing and dangerous. One day, he ran into a set of tabbies that went by the name of Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer. "Say," he said to the two, after hearing their song and everything that they could do, "I heard that there's some girl that a witch has locked in a tower. DO you think you could get her out?"  
  
Mungo shrugged. "Oi don' see whoi not!" he proclaimed, and his sister nodded her agreement.  
  
And so, they traveled to the tower which was conveniently close (how did that ever happen? * whistles innocently *). Mungo and Rumple did manage to get in, but when they saw the horrendous length of Electra's hair, they each jumped out of a tower window, dying instantly.  
  
Pouncival, who was standing nearby, just shook his head and called up to Electra, "HEY! If your hair's long enough to kill those two, d'you think I can climb up on it?"  
  
Electra throught for a moment before lowering her hair out the window. "I suppose so," she said as she did this.  
  
Pouncival climbed up swiftly, and when he got up, he took a pair of scissors that had magically appeared in his belt. He trimmed it quickly into a fashionable style, talking all the time. "You see, my older brother Plato was the crown prince, but he ran off to become a hairdresser. He always was a little...you know." As Electra nodded, he continued, "He wanted me to come with him and ended up teaching me all the stuff, but I didn't want to go. I'd much rather roam the countryside and have adventures."  
  
Electra, now with 90% less headfur, agreed. "Let's blow this popsicle stand!" she said with a laugh.  
  
So they did.  
  
It wasn't a pretty sight.  
  
The witch Etcetera soon showed up and looked displeased. Then she ran back to Tugger and told him what his daughter had been doing in the tower. He looked pleased and yelled something about 'following in his footsteps'.  
  
Etcetera was even more displeased. She forgot that she was a witch and could change it all, so she stepped back and hung herself with the rope of Electra's ugly headfur.  
  
Pouncival and Electra moved into the cottage where the Witch Etcetera had lived, and soon all of the other neighbors moved away because of the noise.  
  
So, everyone lived happily ever after, including Etcetera, who hung (bad pun) around as a ghost to pester Tugger to leave Bombalurina...and this time, he has a valid excuse.  
  
"Etcy, you're DEAD!"  
  
"Soooooooooooo?"  
  



End file.
